Depression

I have had trouble all day with depression creeping in to spoil my joy, and it almost succeeded. But a good friend sent me an email, that just made me realize God brought me to this situation, and he will take me through. I think sometimes, my depression happens because I have always been spoiled. I know if only Billy was here my life would be so different, but I know this is not possible. I am still grieving, will it ever really get better?
Could it be I am expecting God to fall for my "pouting" because I am having a rough time. Please give me a break! It is past time for me to grow up and just Trust the Lord, like I profess that I do.
Why is it, we all can talk, but when our walk has to match, I (speaking for myself) fail. I pray several times a day, do my Bible Study, and profess to God I Trust and Love Him, but then I whine and get depressed. Wheres the trust I say I have?
I am deeply ashamed of myself for today. God gave me a beautiful day and I wasted it with feeling sorry for myself.
God if tomorrow is mine I will take the day and Praise you for the Blessing.